There seems to be an increased proliferation of book marketing companies springing up by the minute. Caveat Emptor. If your Latin is rusty that literally translates as “let the buyer beware.”

This cautionary tale is especially aimed at self-published authors. The first time the internet bots crawl across the fact that you’re a writer, get ready for the deluge of unsolicited emails advising of services that you did not know that you needed or even wanted.

Writers have a creative talent in the age-old craft of storytelling. These sudden inbox-stuffers want to make money on a writer’s need for readers. Most of these companies have vague terms for the packages/bundles on their websites. Most of them do not list the itemized price of the “services” in the package. Most of them will not allow a la carte purchases. Most of them will include praise for your book in their quest for your money. Most of them do not tailor their product to your product, and therefore are not targeting your “likely readers.”

Regardless of what you have done or paid to have done, many of these marketing companies will say that they can do “better” than what you have already done, be it a “better” website or book cover or editing, and they are most happy to reinvent your wheel for a large amount of money. They rarely show any understanding of the uniqueness of each genre.

One of my favorite eye-rolls is that these superhuman marketers can, in fact, market a book they have not read; yes, they are omniscient.

They will willingly sell lists of bookstores, and libraries, and social media posts, and book clubs, and more ideas for you to solicit. Go for it. Or do a search yourself, which you can do for free.

Return of the Nigerian Prince Redux: Beware Book Club and Book Review Scams

Recently, I was contacted by a company with a Texas phone number saying they were in New York. When I asked about the Texas phone number, the answer was that it was their desk phone, which makes no sense since landlines are local numbers, not out-of-state numbers.

They proceeded to tell me that I had contacted them in December and they were getting back to me (in July!). Of course I had not contacted them. Possibly the hope was that I wouldn’t remember whether I contacted them or not by the time July rolled around. However, even if I had contacted them, getting back to me seven months later would not have been impressive.

Another company out of California sent me data on their marketing results for a cookbook as a comparison of what they could do for my fiction work. I’d have to try the recipes first, but even I could market a cookbook. Their example had nothing to do with marketing fiction. Nothing.

The realities are that nonfiction marketing is completely different from marketing fiction. Nonfiction has a built-in topic that is specific. A topic that is readily searchable for someone wanting information on that topic. Arranging speaking gigs is easier with nonfiction. The cover art is mostly words without genre-specific art.

How does one find a novel of any genre that has a theme of reconciliation and forgiveness, or a brave character in an unexpected challenge? Pick some keywords, search Amazon, and hope for the best.

Speaking of Amazon, there are a ton of marketing books on Amazon. I’ve bought a few. They all say to put your brand on social media. Right, I have a day job and a normal life. I do not have the desire or time to be on social media endlessly. Additionally, these marketing books instruct that one can host book signings, arrange speaking engagements, get a booth at book fairs, and whatnot like this is a new idea. With what money and time, these books don’t specify.

One can purchase click pay-per-click ads with Google, Amazon, and who knows what other company. I have a friend who deliberately clicks on these sponsored ads to drive up the fee, with no intention of purchasing the product or service.

I don’t know the solution to finding niche readers over the long haul. No one does. It’s magic I suppose, and a big dose of luck unless you’re a well-known public figure.

I do know Caveat Emptor was a hard lesson for me to learn.